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17.12.10

Confusion

How do you find love in darkness or is 
that why they say love is blind? It's the simple things I crave but does it seem
illusive because life is so complicated or is life complicated because I live a
life of illusion? I struggle and fight to feel your passion or can I not find
where your passion lies because it's been lost in a frustrating trail of regret?
Its my lonesome tears that keeps me fighting for a love as blind as ours but how
do you hold on to hope when it has been lost in deceit created by others? Faith
in you is faith in me longing to love free, but where do we find the space to be
free when from the beginning it was faulted by those un-willing to see? The
spirit of a love so strong binded my insecurity followed by hatred understood
with compassion yet falling quickly in to a pool of devastation, where does the
trust in us begin and the outer evils ignored to find that place where fate
brought us together and a love so meant to be can become worthy of all things
great? Sincerity lost in a sea of judgment where we once held each other dear
and true, how do we begin to move on when there was no end? Closure they say can
help us heal but how do we heal when the pain was inflicted with cruel
intentions not by you or I but by hands of outsiders looking in on something
they do not understand?  How do I let go of something I believed
in that has touched my very soul leaving me confused with bewilderment that it
has happened again leaving me unsure and afraid to love again? How do I say I'm
being selfish with out being vein, when true I want what I want but only to keep
me sane? Lost in your shadow, cold, lifeless and unstable fighting to see me,
how do I tell you I'm tired with sleepless nights and hectic days with out
inflicting sorrow upon your heart?

To be free of me is to be free of you,
can you imagine the possibilities of life with out us? I am now beginning to
see!

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