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Look For it Here

26.7.11

Beautifully Poetic

There it goes
tapping a my soul's window
Penetrating my emotional,
begging for release to flow
No where to go
Captively held deep within
Me vowing to never let it speak again
It, which was once my friend
Who spoke to much
revealing my secrets
Holding me in its clutch
While presumably setting me free
Poetry..........

untitled (couldn't think of one)

Staring out a smeared window into the distance. 
Looking for something that I felt...no, that I knew existed. 
It was a love that my mind had consumed. 
A sudden instance that I knew I couldn't get from you. 
See, in his arms is where my heartbeat found it's tune. 
And when my body was wrapped in his 
there was a sudden moment of a love brand new. 
And when we kissed, my emotions I felt. 
And I knew deep within, this couldn't be provided by no one else. 
And then what I thought truly existed became a distant memory. 
And the tears I cried, they alone couldn't set me free. 
This broken heart I carried with me through the day and on into my sleep. 
The words he spoke as he left is that, no one could ever love me...
not the way he did or could even make me feel as good. 
And then I found that what I longed for, only you could provide. 
A love that'll be forever not just this lifetime. 
I've looked all over trying to find love in the only places I knew. 
Until I realized that there's no other love, greater than you!

29.6.11

I NEVER KNEW YOU


I NEVER KNEW YOU, BUT I’VE ALWAYS FELT YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, BUT IF I EVER CAME CLOSE TO YOU I WOULD KNOW YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, BUT IN LIFE I’VE ALWAYS DESIRED YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, BUT MY HEART HAS ALWAYS HAD LOVE FOR YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, BUT I SWEAR I WOULD GIVE MY ALL TO YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, YET MY EYES ALWAYS SEE YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, YET I ALWAYS BREATHED YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, YET WITH EVERY THOUGHT, MY LIFE IS INSPIRED
I NEVER KNEW YOU, SO WHY IS IT I CAN’T STOP THINKING OF YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, SO WHY IS IT MY HEART YEARNS FOR YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, SO WHY IS IT MY LIFE DEPENDS ON YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, BUT THE VERY ESSENCE OF YOU SPARKS SUNSHINE IN MY LIFE 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, BUT IN MY DREAMS IT SEEMS AS IF I CONVERSE WITH YOU 
I NEVER KNEW YOU, BUT HOW WILL I KNOW YOU, UNTIL I FIRST FIND ME!!! 


17.5.11

Healed Hurt

I am hurt so I hurt and that is not fair to hurt the people who really do care I am tierd and in pain sometimes my heart feels slain
Sometimes my mind feels cluttered
Sometimes my spirit is like a tossed salad
Sometimes my body is like a two week old rose
My speech makes no sense

I hurt so I hurt and that is not fair because all guys are not the same and I know that there is one out there
One who will set my soul to another level of non stop flowing of a valcanoes lava
One who will make my heart pump from the outside man when God blesses me with this guy

11.5.11

Assume The Position

 Sirens blaring being blinded by a flash light
More on looking pedestrians than the black hawk crash sight
Just last night
He was laying in bed dreaming of a peaceful place
Now he's standing here, hand on this hot ass hood pulled over cause of his race

10.5.11

Blind Liberty

In remote areas of my mind
I travel thru time
So blind
To the innocence of my own kind
Press rewind

An the thoughts replay over and over like a repeat function
Best friend got popped in the head next to him but told the pigs he didnt see nuthing
I see sumthing

Maternalism

Serenity/Bliss
they bring it all with their signature mix
Suspended in this,
brings me internal warmth and my temperature lifts
Rejuvenating my youth with their essence alone
When there, my tension's soothed like I've stepped in my home
Different shades creates the days into nights of their weather
Liking the sunny colors,
but concluded the darker delights are just better
My desires are wetter so thunderous storms they supply are my pleasure
Even in rain, their surroundings maintain
to bring me fires in sectors
As seasons change, it seems deranged
with the ways their moods swing
Concurring with the dispersing of sunlight
and blossoming full moon beams
Circles of power surface to flower the planet with inspiration

Gemineye - "Penny for Your Thoughts"

10.4.11

Contradiction

While they are teaching you, they are breaking you,
While they are making you,, they are raping you.
While instilling, they are blinding you.
While they show you everything, you miss out on what’s important to you,
They are overwhelming you.
The influence of the majority is still their most powerful tool!
While they influence, pain inspires you.
While you worship them, they feed you new liars!!!
While you become sick from their ways, they recruit new fools!
And you support the liars!
While you’re so proud of what you have, they take it from you.
While you’re not questioning, they are finding answers.
While you’re on page twenty, they've written books and added new chapters.
You know the saying, tell one lie, you gotta tell another…while you've grown so complex,
They've become even more!
To much of anything will kill you, a true rule of the heart.
I've mastered complex, I’m pure simple, go with the heart.

30.3.11

I Am My Pen

Thru the highlight of events, from the leadership to the domestic violence…
None of that scared her more, than her writing.
Left it all behind, still carrying the notebooks,
Pain is what she was reciting...
Living her life, the way she wanna,
not caring about the judge,
no matter how ignorant they judged...
she's always been able to look thru you,
And keep writing…

28.3.11

I Need

I need a fairytale, a world wind, a prince, a white night, a gladiator, a lion, a wolf in man's clothing!
I need a hero, a superman, a ray of light, someone to make me feel this life, to lift me high above the clouds, to unblind my eyes to see the sunrise.
I need a crush, a love, a lustful lust, a simple touch, a feel that's way to much, someone strong to hold in my clutch.
I need a kiss, a wet kiss, a deep juicy kiss, one that when he's gone, I would truly miss.
I need hands, hands that will touch me everywhere, hands that are large or small, I don't care!

I Need!!!

I need to be held, held tight and never let go, hands to touch my body, sometimes nice and sometimes slow.
I need to feel, to feel his body pressed against mine, for him to drown me, drown into me like a fine red wine.
I need a pulse, a heart beat a throbbing to release my soul, to warm my blood because right now it's cold!!
I need a breath to breath deep into me, bring me back to life, to open my eyes from this dark allowing me to see the light.

I Need!!!

19.3.11

Today's Tomorrow

Like an echoed word spoken soft, whispered silent
... Today

searching still but heard, wonder where all the time went
... Tomorrow

some say "Love Today", make your own,
not to borrow, do not let time stray .....
Today, Tomorrow

it's not how it goes, to find faith is not first sight
... Today

no ribbons or bows unless each heart is set right
... Tomorrow

time is in the weigh 

to balance love's story
sometimes blue, some in sorrow ...
make love the right way,
Today, Tomorrow

Velvet in Motion


I have never felt
velvet before ...
that breathes

expanding night's horizons
stretching me
to unknown limits
giving me strengths, abound
to share heavenly lights
suddenly touchable

allowing me to be not someone
but THE one

filling your glass
complimenting your thirst
savoring your taste ...

deeply, eternal
before the dawn finds sleep
and such stars
crush

6.3.11

Experienced

I Was Not Born 
Experienced
But
The Hard Realities,
Deceiving Natures,
Broken Promises,
Double Faces,
Attractive Words,
Melting Emotions,
Lovely Feelings,
Harsh Truths,
Bitter Behaviors,
Loving Attitude,
Ignoring Acts,
Multi Standards
& False Statements.
These All Taught Me
What Experience Is

4.3.11

In Writing

I can make the ordinary
Sound extraordinary
in writing
I can take a simple moment, 
freeze it, embrace it
And turn it into an unforgettable experience
in writing
I can take you on a journey with my words
Hear me, 
feel me
in writing
You're the passenger 
just relax 
and enjoy what I’m sharing with you.
in writing
I can make you see things you never noticed before
Or payed much attention to.
See the world though my eyes
The eyes of an artist
in writing

When I Became a Man

24.2.11

Let Me Adore You

Listen...
Listen deep into my words as if you are sliding inside of me for the very first time.

And feel me...

Feel the thumping of my heart, my blood that courses through my veins for you...  All of what you are feeling inside of me right now... is what I feel for you.

Feel my skin as it warms to a temperature of boiling, the wetness of it, the trembling of it, the twitching, the reddening of it...  all of this... is because of you.

22.2.11

Blowin My Mind

You call to me silently
Where whispers are echoes
Deep in the valley of my soul
I hear your voice
A choice that comes naturally
I lay awake and ache for your touch
Longing to be made love to
And make love to you
Hands that rub and caress
My breast and thighs
Sighs

17.2.11

The Possibilities

Sweet words and subtle gestures, through phone calls and text messages,
occupied thoughts on late nights make  mind restless,
chance encounters, fresh conversations, and first impressions,
made on first dates a natural progression,
more talk a lot of laughter and sharing some life lessons,
that your sharing to get some insight into their perspective,
trying not to seem to interested,
but never for a second let'em feel neglected,
still cant cross the line, feelings protected,
discussed the situation of sex'n, regardless if you agreed with the perception, you decide to respect it, 

even without the sex shit, they're somebody you mesh with, and you see a possible connection,
Out comes the affection, attempting to be the mate of perfection, making a damn good selection

this is far from a waste of the time they're investing, your loyalty's no question, hearts move
In a more deep direction, tossing out the fears, doubts and the second guessing, 
less as a relationship and more as a blessing,

Seasons

I'm trapped in freedom,
reluctantly standing strong refusing to fall which actually makes me 
the weak one,
every now and then I hear whispers of a heroine planning to release him
but I never seen none,
I’m married to the seclusion no incarnation of intrusion can come
between’em,
two steps away from leaning in with the demons, I’m starting to listen and 
believe’em,
that releasing my rage would be appeasing, I should embrace this fierce feeling of fiending,
with no fear of loosing out or forgetting about the future for which I been dreaming,
my hopes have departed long before this poem started and I aint worried about them leaving,
so acting out of my good sense and being outlandish seem convenient,
almost gives me meaning,
but I have yet to leap in whole heartedly cause honestly
Its freezing,
from when I lay to rest my head till I wake up in my empty bed,
I continue on for one reason,
I need to buy more sweaters,
cause though my brain may skip through different planes and in solitude you never come out the same and everything you know seems to change
except for
the season.

Patience

A silhouette,
dancing in my thoughts and flirting with my memory,
pirouettes around my emotions provoking and tempting me with intimacy,
revealing yourself intricately, while my minds trying to make sense of the scenes you’re presenting me,
so seductive yet reluctant to completely give you me,
as I tussle with desire in belief that getting acquainted would dull the fire and preserve thinking sensibly,
surprised by my sensitivity,

12.2.11

3:08am

Welcome to my world...
A world without boundaries,
without laws, with out flaws.
A world of beauty and splender,
with no consideration of color or gender.
The sun never sets here,
dark clouds never get here.
When it rains, you get warm and wet here.
Never cold, always the right temperature,
the right season, for all the right reasons,
one, because love is in the air..
Can you smell it?
A world without a care?
Temptations and relations are only between lovers,
released emotions while sensually
coastin` underneath the covers...
Where you can love freely,
love eternally, love entirely...
Anyone, or anything you please,
and no worries of famine or disease.
Only inside me this world lives, breathes,
in my mental was concieved,
and someday for it to be reality, believed.
So, come with me,
take a journey, see the sites,
as I take this new world order
of love to brand new heights...

Poetic Teacher

Do not choose a fresh page from a brand new journal
use paper that has been crumbled and tossed
thrown out by a spineless father only to be recycled
Save a tree for future poets to write under

Rewrite me into someone more attractive
stronger than life has made me
make me tough and sexy, aggressive like a tiger
stain the pages with cum, lube, the arousal you find
at the sight of naked boys, draw me sketches
bring the words to life with images
make me a man with this poem

28.1.11

Where Your Head Used To Be

I could stand looking for hours
At the dent you left for me
In the pillow next to mine
Where your head used to be
The only thing you left behind
Is just a temporary memory
Never wanting to erase it
Where your head used to be
The angels came and took you
Far away from me
Now all I have is the impression
Of were your head used to be
I know that if I move it
The dent I will no longer see
I never want to lose the place
Where your head used to be
I guess that I should make the bed
And set your spirit free
But I will always remember
Where your head used to be

24.1.11

He Fears Me

Clearly he feared me, or was it fear of himself. 
Untouched flesh that goosebumps covered 
From the sensation of my breath, 
upon the sultry scented neck he possessed.  
Clearly he desired me, Aspired to acquire me 
Yet, he clearly feared me, 
Perhaps he could see the duality of my personality, 
evil and good. 

23.1.11

She Remembered {Part 1} A short story collab with Juan Johnson

She stumbles into the door as if to be in a drunken haze. She known she hadn't drank anything and in fact remembers sitting on that God awful bench. It had the look that screamed termites and a stinch that you would surely mistake for a men's urinal at a local truck stop. She knew that she remembers being at the bus stop waiting for the #10 bus. She's had a long day at work and was more ready than ever to just get home bathe and engage in a little R&R. Customer service is a shitty position but she always made sure each customer left with a smile. She was never a socialite and not the most popular in high school. Back then it was her thin frame and slinky build that made her the target of the pickings. She was surely to be the bud of the cliques and the ousting of the geeks. She grew to live the story of The Ugly Duckling and although she had managed to gained a few pounds and curves in a couple of place, she was never able to grow out of the stigma small town life had given her.

She made her way to the bathroom, trying to make sense of what just happened. She was drawing a total blank. Her body ached, her legs were sore and her shoulders feel like they had been ripped from her body. Her finger were bloody and covered in dirt and there was a nagging burning sensation between her legs as if she had sex the very moment she sat down on that ridden bench. She had felt this feeling before but hadn't felt it in a long time. Not since prom night her senior year. She remembers so vividly because that was the night she lost her virginity. She really didn't want to lose it to Bobby Wellington but she felt like she was the only one of her senior class who had not had sex. After she hit her junior year and her body brought her the respect and attention she so wanted, she vowed to herself she would never feel like the outsider again. But Bobby wasn't it, nor was "It" right. She hadn't figured out what went wrong but she promised herself the next time would be with someone she loved and cared for. Some that would love and care for her back. But she Knew for a fact she hadn't sex but had she fallen off the bus, she wondered.

21.1.11

ALPHABET SOUP


Angry as hell
But I can’t
Cry and let it out cause I
Don’t want anyone to realize that
Even though I may seem strong outside I really am
Frightened and scared to know that I may never
Get to truly be
Happy cause my real feelings are stored on the
Inside. So I laugh it off as if it’s a
Joke and I’m only just
Kidding around. I really need to stop this because I’m
Letting it control
My everyday life. I need to go back to feeling
Normal and try to
Overcome this pain that’s forever
Promising to not let me get up. I want to go back to my
Quintessence where life was understood and rarely
Reviewed because I always knew what
Steps I was going to
Take next. And I always
Understood what my
Very purpose
Was here on this world. But now I’m feeling like a
Xenophobe. Like I hate all people but myself when what I’m really
Yearning for is someone to
Zap me back to reality.

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